What’s Inside The Box-Episode 2
Welcome my friend. Welcome to the window. Close your eyes, see your face pressed against the cool glass. Listen to the gentle rain falling. Falling on the roof, dropping from the leaves. Take a deep breath. You are safe, you are here and it is ok it ok now to feel what you need to feel?
So, Where does it hurt?
Bring your attention to your breath. Gently like the swaying of the trees outside, breathe in…hold…breathe out. Again, with me, breathe in…hold…breathe out.
Where does it hurt?
Let your thoughts drift to that inner room of your soul where you keep the things that are too painful, too raw for the everyday eyes. What is inside the box in the middle of this room? Give yourself permission to consider the presence of this box. Lower your shoulders. Rest your back gently and securely in your space.
The first step in healing is to be able to look. To acknowledge theres pain. To hold the memory in the light. To be willing to release it from the box you have taped shut so tightly.
Are you willing?
Feel yourself loosening the grip on the box, and allowing what’s inside just to be in the light of this moment.
Place your hand over your heart, feel the beautiful rhythm of life beating…you are here…you are here…you…you..beautiful amazing, wonderful you. (Thunder)
The pain, the memory, the emotions have not destroyed you . You are right here, companioned with courage, spirit, strength.
Hear over you the words of the ONE who created you. Who loved you before you were ever conceived, who called you by name before you ever entered your mother’s womb.
Bring it to me. This box. I know it is heavy. You have carried it for so long. Let me hold it. I care for you. I want to help you bear this burden. You are not alone in the carrying. Lift it to me…put it in my hands….I am strong enough. Let’s look at it together.
The pain inside this box had meant to break your spirit , to snuff your creative light out of this world. But I didn’t let it. I have protected you with my sheltering wing. You can trust my heart for you. I will never take what little strength you have and break you further. I will not abuse you.
Where others have run away from you in your weaknesses, I pull you close. I have seen you at your worst, and I have loved you with a love that will never ever end.
Cry out to me. I will not ignore you. Nothing you have to say is unimportant to my heart. Let me hear the sound of you voice, and I will answer you in your distress.
I hear you ache with the longing for freedom, wondering how long this pain has to endure. I promise there is an expiration date. Everything has a time, and a place to begin and to end. I will bring beauty from the ashes of this destruction in you, come to me I have a deep rest waiting for you. You can trust my love to endure forever.
Come to me. I know you are weary, I know it is heavy…l have rest for you…let me have what is hurting your soul.
Bring your thoughts back to your breath. Breathe in…hold…breathe out. 2x
Are you Willing?
Words For When It Feels Broken Inside-Episode 1
Words For When It Feels Broken Inside
A Soul Care Minute Meditation
You, my friend are welcome here. Feel space open for you to step into, out from, cold hard ice-ness. These words are for you a hearth fire gift of presence.
I know. I know the long road of stones thrown at your soft heart flesh, I know what it is to suffer word bruises that leave your soul along the side of the road, desperately needing healing oil, .these words are my offering of gentle coolness, to fevered brow. May you receive them as balm upon the open, jagged edges.
So, You are safe now. Quiet your mind and your will and your heart and your body….be still. Close your eyes and open your heart. Open. Open your hands. Open.
Bring your thoughts to your breath – feel the sacred wind, the divine essence of life move in, then out. Breathe in deeply, now let go. Let your breath move out of you, and with it all the hot, moist memory of what you have been made to swallow as truth, but which you know…is not truth. It’s not who you are.
Breathe it out. Push your next exhaling breath with more force, be intentional like the wind shaking the tops of the trees…let them bow before the gale of your release. Watch them in your mind…See them bend, sway, bend, sway and come back upright again. Feel yourself as the trees. Feel the flexibility that comes from your rootedness…you will not break, you will not crash upon the ground, you will not bend forever, all storms run out of rain, eventually….
Bring your mind to focus again upon your breath. Breathe in hold breath out, breathe in, hold, breathe out…with each exhalation, bring your mind to focus on your body. Listen to your skin. Listen to where it is tight, weak, tender, hungry.
Where are the weight of the words that were hurled upon you resting in your physical space? Our body keeps the score…where does it hurt? Gently touch the area experiencing pain or tightness. Hold your space with kindness. As you would cradle a child or a small infant who was needing care, needing comfort, who was scared, hold your space.
Lower your shoulders, sit, deeper into your seat, hips rooted downward, back resting supported. Press the soles of your feet gently upon the ground. Move your toes back and forth gently…YOU ARE HERE. You have not disappeared. Envision a warm, soft blanket being placed around you. This is love. This is grace. This is peace, presence, spirit, knowing…This is love.
From this place of safety, grounded in loving presence. Receive over you these words of truth. Do not judge them, dismiss them, swipe them away….receive them for they are medicine for the fractured cells fighting to stay alive inside you, fighting to protect your immune system, your organs, your mind, your emotions. They are healing light against chaos. Chaos comes when what was known becomes unknown, what was whole becomes fractured, what was loyal becomes betrayal what was light becomes darkness.
Together we go to the altar of the heart. Let us offer up these broken pieces, and wait for the Fire of Love to fall, and consume our offering.
Hear the words of LOVE that are truth. Spoken by the only ONE good and true. The Father of Lights, The Mighty Fortress and Buttress against the storms of this life. The ONE who is our rock of refuge and our hiding place. The Eternal Ageless ONE who has no shadow in HIM. Father, Abba…GOD.
What was meant for evil against you, to harm you, I will turn it and cause it to be used for your good…yes…even that, and that….and that.
Trust in me, my character, my nature, my name…Come learn my voice. Let it be louder than the railing sound of your accuser…I won’t disappoint you. I won’t make you ashamed…ever. They tried to make me ashamed to, but I despised their shame and I sit now with all authority over every nation, tribe, man, woman child…Shame IS NOT YOUR PORTION.
You are my poem, written upon the palm of my hand, and I love to read it aloud so all of the galaxies in all of the universes can know how I feel about you, and add it to their eternal song.
You are never alone, I will never leave you, ever. I will not abandon you on the day you cry out for help.
I am closer to you than the blood that runs in your veins.
You take my breath away when you look at me, just one glance from your eyes filled with devotion and I am undone. Oh, how you move me. Do you know how beautiful, and powerful your love is?
You have deep capacity for love-. that is why it cuts knife like when your love is rejected, scorned, mocked, un-returned. I know this. I too was wounded, mocked, scorned and rejected by those I gave my life to love. I can hold you in this place …I forgave their ignorance of my love. I can teach you to forgive. Let me hold you in this place.
Let me hear the sound of your voice. Don’t hide your pain, your tears, your cry from me….let me have it all. Let me wipe away every tear from your eyes and sustain you with my love.
I will bring joy to you out of your great sorrow. I promise there will always be dawn, after the blackest night.
No weapon, of word or deed will succeed in destroying you. You will rise up, again and again and again for I am with you. I am your defender.
Bring your thoughts back to your breath. Feel the wind. Feel the life. Sense the stillness of your soul. Gently place your hand over your heart. Know this drum beat of existence. You are here. You are loved. You are whole. Stay quiet for a few more moments. Don’t rush to re engage your surroundings. Move gently upward.
Open your eyes. Breathe. Hello you. Beautiful…beautiful you.